Of Modifications and Moria

We took a big step forward today: all the blueprints, paperwork, and applications for our building permit have been turned into the building department. I've spent the last few weeks going over the plans and paperwork, modifying the blueprints, checking the modifications on a scale model, re-modifying the blueprints, rechecking the plans and paperwork, and generally being completely neurotic about everything.

The plans are for one of countryplans.com's small houses. You can see some of the details here: Victoria's Cottage

One of the big selling points was the bridge loft option. It has a loft in the front of the house, a loft at the back of the house, and a sky bridge connecting the two. A sky bridge.

OMG, a sky bridge, you guys!

Now, I'm very happy with the package I've received from countryplans. They are very detailed and they have a really good forum for owner-builders to ask questions and share their experiences. The only thing I had an issue with is that there isn't an overview of the bridge loft in the blueprints. There's one for the full loft, but the loft bridge is only shown in cross section. So, I got out my white out and modified it. I'm pretty sure I have it drawn out so that it meets code, but I'm still a bit nervous.

See, I NEED the loft bridge across the great room. It's absolutely vital to my existence. You don't even understand. It will do so many things:1. It allows sunlight to pass into the lower level of the house. This will provide ample natural lighting and will aid passive heating in the winter.

                                       

2. It allows heat to rise from the lower level to the very peak of the roof, thus passively cooling the lower level in the summer.
                                       

3. Every time we have to pass one another on the bridge, it will go something like this:

4. Nerf Wars. 'Nuff said.

Now we wait some more. Fingers crossed, it will be approved and we can move forward.

Coffee

There's nothing really major to write about today. I don't have any dorky drawings, or big announcements, or chilling tales to tell. However, I feel like tonight is a turning point of sorts. I hope. I seems that my husband's new employers have finally given him a full forty hours this week.

Huge fucking YAY!

This is a very good development. See, Andy started looking for work closer to our land so we could save money on gas and take one more step towards making this area our home. He found a staffing agency that told him they had several immediate full-time positions for him. So he quit his old job and accepted one of the agency's positions.

Only the employer told him to come back on Monday for his first day of work.

Then on Monday he was told to come back on Thursday.

Then come back the following Monday.

And on it went with a day of work here, or a couple days there sprinkled in between. After several weeks of working with the employer and the agency and filling out applications elsewhere, I think we  may be on solid ground.

Knock on wood.

The situation was doing very bad things to my head. It was like creepy Uncle Bad Touch for my brain. I had to really speed up selling off my ponies to make up for the lost income, but hopefully I can relax a little now.

To celebrate, I indulged myself. Instead of getting the crappy coffee in the big can I got the fancy coffee in the bag.

Livin' large.

For the rest of the night I'm going to kick back, put on some Netflix, and clean up some ponies.

Hot sauce, pop tarts, and ponies. Because I'm an adult.

The Saga of Percival

While my daughter and I were digging the trench for our water line, she came across a large wolf spider. She and this spider became acquainted and she decided his name was Percival.

In all honesty, I do not like spiders. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate spiders in that they eat bugs. I will not kill them without a good reason. However, I cannot completely overcome my reflexive shriek and cringe when one crosses my path.

Percival, however, was fairly charming for a big gross spider. He would scurry along the top of the trench and play in the freshly overturned dirt. When the dirt at the top of the trench was no longer interesting, he'd leap into the trench...


                                  

... and he'd start digging in the dirt at the bottom of the trench.

                                 


Then he'd climb up the side and start the whole process over. He was indeed quite the charmer... for a giant revolting spider.

As I continued digging I see a flash of bright orange. Turning, I see a large wasp with a deep blue body and orange wings pulling an incapacitated Percival down the side of the trench.

                                     

Now, I've seen enough Animal Planet to know exactly what happened. That was a spider wasp. That was one of nature's great horror shows. You see, spider wasps don't just kill their eight legged prey. Oh, no. When one of these flying sociopaths stings its victim, the spider is only paralyzed. It is then taken to the wasp's lair where it is left with a single wasp egg laid on its abdomen. When the egg hatches, the poor unfortunate arachnid is eaten alive.

                                              

Oh, but we're not done yet. Eating its prey alive isn't enough. Somehow the larva knows how to eat around the vital organs until the very end, keeping the spider alive as long as possible.

You're welcome for the nightmare fuel.

                                       

Just to add to how charming these bugs are, they also pack the second most painful sting of any insect. We owe this knowledge to Justin O. Schmidt, the man that gave us the Schmidt pain scale. It seems that prior to his research scientists had no official rating on insect stings outside of, "meh," "ouch," and "HOLY MOTHER OF A TAP DANCING TURD BUCKET THAT HURT." Now thanks to one man subjecting himself to all manner of stinging insects, we have simple convenient numbers to assign to pain levels.

Thanks Justin O. Schmidt.

Knowing the fate in store for our spidery friend put me in a quandary. I had grown rather fond of the big gross fellow and I hated to see him become larva chow. On the other hand, this is how nature works and it's not really my place to interfere.

So, I watched the wasp carry him down the trench and back up the other side.

Now, I'm no insect scientist so I don't know how spider wasp venom works. However it was supposed to work on Percival, well, it didn't. He went from being all curled up and stiff to an octopedal Mike Tyson. Epic wasp-spider battle ensued.

That settled my dilemma. That little guy had charm and personality. Somehow he managed a successful saving throw against a powerful foe, and dammit, I was stepping in. I grabbed my shovel, broke up the fight...


                          

                          

                         

... and Percival wandered off to spider another day.

What Is This?

That first post probably needs some explanation. Probably a lot of explanation.

Where do I start?

How about I start with where I am in life right now. Currently I am sitting in a tiny house on wheels surrounded by boxes of My Little Ponies.

Why? Wut?

For now I want to focus on the present and my ultimate goals and leave my motivations for a later post. My husband and I have purchased a five acre plot of land in rural Kansas. We are presently transitioning from the suburbs of Kansas City to a simpler and more sustainable life. These ponies were a major part of my life and now they are playing a major role in this transition.

We are attempting to do this whole thing debt free. The land was purchased with cash. We own it free and clear. We were able pay for it by cutting our expenses down as far possible and saving our money. Now we have the land, we have a humble little temporary home, and it's time to build our permanent home. I have a three point plan for doing this and not taking on debt:

1. Work our dicks off
2. Sell our unnecessary belongings
3. Work our dicks off some more

Seems pretty solid. Maybe.

So, I've been here selling off my collection on eBay. If you've never sold on eBay before let me just tell you this: it is a lot of work. I spend countless hours cleaning, and photographing, and editing, and fighting eBay's crappy interface, and making boxes, and packing, and printing, and rushing to the post office. Then sometimes they look at me from their boxes and I feel just a little regret that they're being sold off. Just a little.

Shut up and get in the box

The ultimate goal is more than worth it. Having our own little place out away from the beige fog of suburbia has been our pipe dream. Only the past several years have pushed us to reconsider how feasible it really was. Turns out, it is fairly feasible.

Maybe.

This land is my land. It is not your land.
It's real grassy... aaaaand it is my land... errybody sing!

Right now we're largely pushing papers around, getting permits, and raising money. We have a root cellar/storm shelter dug out and trenches for the water lines. We've run into some delays because of permits and banks and paper work. I'll be posting more about these delays later, but for now I'll just say, I'm not shocked by these delays. I'm just disappointed.

We'll be building our house largely ourselves. I've found so much inspiration from the tiny house movement and many alternative building movements. I'd love to do straw bale. I'd love to do earth bag. We chose a location that is relatively lax when it comes to building methods, but either of those methods are still going to be outside of our local code. I still think we can incorporate the spirit of these movements in what we do.

We plan on growing some crops and raising some livestock. Mostly small things like chickens, ducks, and rabbits. Eventually perhaps we'll have goats or sheep. My husband has experience working on a farm. Full admission, I do not have a great deal of experience. All I really have is some time in a greenhouse, many years of gardening, and the times I visited my great grandmother's farm. Those visits probably won't help. I was fairly young and was mostly told to just stay out of the way. In fact, my most vivid memory of the farm went something like this:

This is still largely how I learn things.

That is why I've decided to start this blog. The response among our friends and family has been immense. We've received so much support. We have some people that think we're nuts (they're probably right). We have people that are supporting us and think we're nuts. We have people that would really like to do what we're doing. So, if I can share our experiences, our triumphs, and our mistakes maybe I can help someone else reach for their dream. Or you can just laugh at us as we blunder, fumble, and possible electrocute ourselves. Either way, I'm good.

In the beginning...